Tangled Times: Unusual News and Views

Fax Causes Bomb Scare at Mass Bank

Fax machines are stressful enough.  Face up or face down?  Dial "9" or not?  And where's the dang confirmation message?

But imagine you were pining away for 5pm and this document came through:

Small Business Commitment Week?  Yikes!  It's the attack of the non-descript promotion - also known as "fax spam."

In most offices, it's crumpled and tossed into the round file.  But in Massachusetts it's cause for alarm.

After a Bank of America employee viewed the fax (left) and feared for his life, he called the authorities and reported the cryptic advertisement as a bomb threat!  Long story short, 15 surrounding businesses, including a day-care were evacuated for three hours.

What's wrong with this state?  First, downtown Boston virtually shut down over a Cartoon Network promotion... next their former Governor, Mitt Romney, back-handed his fellow New Englanders during the Republican Debates.  And now, some dweeb pushing papers at B of A has stopped the presses due to a fax message.

If the Red Sox weren't in first place, these folks would have nothing to live for!

Don't Hate Wolfowitz...Hate the Game

It's hard not to vent about Paul Wolfowitz's flagrant lack of character and credentials.  But I'll do my best.  It's easy to go for the jugular when a public figure screws up - low-hanging fruit of bloggers and reporters alike.

So try as we might... we can't ignore this grinning Bush goon.  One has to be smart to get into this kind of trouble.  Foxy smart... with some guts to match one's lack of a conscience.

Bush appointed Wolfowitz back in 2005.  (Prior to that, he was known as the principle architect of the lovely skirmish in Iraq.)  As President of the World Bank, he presided over some 10,000 employees.  One of those 10,000 would prove to be his downfall.

Shaha Riza entered Wolfowitz's life and became a romantic interest.  And he responded by promoting her up the ladder, with tax-free bonuses, boosting her salary into six-figures.

Well ain't that special.  A little love on the side - and a payoff to boot.  Some women are hard to keep happy - and in this case, damn near impossible. 

Call it a crime of passion.

Everyone knows...whether you're managing a Wendy's restaurant or the Whitehouse staff - you cannot, should not, must not have direct control of a romantic partner or relative.  Yet this type of hanky-panky goes on ALL THE TIME.

So Wolfowitz got burned.  He was forced to resign.  (I call that a time-release firing...since no one at the top of the pyramid ever sees a pink slip.)

Then he has the nerve to tell the AP, "I think it tells us more about the media than about the bank and I'll leave it at that."  In other words... he was not responsible for...anything.  It's a classic 'spin cycle' defense. 

Well, not to worry... "Wolfy" will be fine... he's mined a pretty penny out of his various government contacts... and enjoyed a tax-free salary all the while.   Bravo, Wolfy, the system was you - and you beat the system.

So where does that leave us?  Among the weeds, of course.

As we approach 2008, a critical election year, the pols trot out their weed-wackers.  They bonk each other on the heads with rubber mallets and toss accusations like frisbees in the spring air.  The grass appears greener - the garden flourishes. 

Then the event is upon us - an election occurs.  And the weed-wackers are put away.  Back comes the undergrowth... up comes the crab grass... stifling and corrupting everything in its path.  It's back to politics as usual.

I hate Wolfowitz as much as I admire him.  In some strange way, he's achieved the American dream.  We all know he's gone about it the wrong way, at least in part.  But he's there all the same... not in a jail cell... not fearing for his life... not threatened by bad resume references.  So what gives? 

That's a question we should all critically ask when reviewing the course of human events.

Fuzzy Math at the NY Times

I just read a NY Times article about troop reduction in Iraq.  The headline:

White House Is Said to Debate ’08 Cut in Iraq Troops by 50%

According to the Times, "The concepts call for a reduction in forces that could lower troop levels by the midst of the 2008 presidential election to roughly 100,000, from about 146,000, the latest available figure, which the military reported on May 1."

OK... I'm by no means a math whiz... but that's not a 50% cut.  It's a 31.5% cut.  Big difference, eh? 

We're talkin' 3rd grade division skills here:

46,000 divided by 146,000 is 31.5%. 

Someone at the Times better check their figures.  While the article did mention a cut from 20 brigades to 10 - that's a misleading statistic.  It's the number of actual human beings over there that's in question... not the number of brigades! 

"Harry Squatter" Goes from Broke Bloke to Debonair Millionaire

Woody Allen once said, "80% of success is showing up." 

And there's no man who's taken those words to heart more than Harry Hallowes.  At 71 years of age, the homeless Hallowes could be easily cast aside as a failure...a bum...a scalawag.  But that's all in the past.  Today, he's a millionaire.  All because the Brit chose the right place to lay down.

Yesterday, he jubilantly emerged from court, having won the right to 8,611 square feet of prime London real estate. 

How did this happen?

For 21 long years, he bedded down on the former site of a nursing home.  In a makeshift shack, Hallowes found a home and stuck with it. 

In 2005, luxury building developers attempted to evict him, but he refused to give in...seeking out his own legal counsel.  Since he had called the lot home for so many years, and no one had previously tried to evict him, the local court ruled in his favor.  Voila...instant millionaire.

When asked what he'd do with the money, the septuagenarian told AFP, "Maybe I'll build myself a house -- everyone else around here seems to love building houses."

Well... for Harry's sake, let's hope the government doesn't invoke eminent domain - in order to construct a low-income housing unit.  At this point, he's going to have a hard time qualifying.

From Coffers to Coffins, Pols Die in Style

So... you think your elected representatives are bad?  Be glad you don't live in Italy.

Citizens of the famed peninsula are fuming over the perks offered to local politicians.  Give-aways include, free lunches, parking, expense accounts and now funerals!

That's right, when a local rappresentante kicks the bucket... his constituents foot the bill. 

Legislation passed under cover of darkness gave pols the right to a free (up to $10,000) funeral.  According to a recent Reuters report, Veneto council president, Marino Finozzi said, "it's not true we approved it at night because we were ashamed. It just happened to be late."

Despite Finozzi's best lavoro di rotazione (a.k.a. "spin job") the public outcry has been fierce.

So there you have it.  Us proles can muddle along, coughing up 40% of our hard-earned income until we croak.  Then the government takes its 50% death tax on any estate over $2,000,000.

If you want to get a laugh out of your accountant... ask her if your funeral costs are "deductible."  Meanwhile, some pols like these Italian "councilors" get a free pass to eternity thanks to the undying, mandatory support of a burgled public.

Eccellente!

Cops Order German Girl: "Clean Your Room!"

A young German lass was ordered to clean her room - first by her mother...then by the local police.

After blowing off her mother's request, the child posted a sign in her bedroom window: "Help!" and "Please call the police!"

The 9-year-old had been observed crying her eyes out and hoisting the hand-made sign, which led a few passers-by to alert the authorities. 

Within minutes, a squadron of cops arrived, banging on the front door.

After a quick glance at the child's room, an officer declared it "a battlefield" and told her she'd better tidy up.  Sure enough, when police returned two hours later, the room was spic and span.

You know, this gives me an idea... Maybe we can start selling these "Help!  Call the Police" signs to parents.  When the cops arrive, the mom or dad on duty can simply direct them to the child's room. 

Instant discipline and zero guilt.  Hey... you pay enough sales tax and state income tax... why not get some free parental assistance out of it?

Ron Paul's Legacy Unfolds, Catching a Nation Offguard

Each year, much is made of the comparison between American Idol and American politics.  By a huge margin, more votes are cast for up-and-coming singers than campaigning politicians.  But that fact is about to change.

And who's the man responsible for this historic shift?  George W. Bush.  "W" has Americans scanning the horizon for a replacement with a nagging intensity.  Even die-hard conservatives are itching to pull the "trap door release" in the Oval Office. 

With 2008 right around the corner, the Republican party is in no way short of Presidential aspirants.  Rudy Giuliani...Mitt Romney...John McCain and a host of others have come out swinging.  Rumor has it that even Newt Gingrich will throw his hat into the crowded ring.

But while most Republican candidates are circling the wagons and blurting out stale party lines... one man is defying their consensus trance and awakening the American spirit.

As you'd expect, he's a bit of a fringe player...with a comparably small war chest.

Perhaps you've heard of him... his name is Ron Paul. 

Dr. Paul, a Congressman from Texas, has captured the hearts and minds of Republicans and Democrats alike, with his message of smaller government, low taxes and non-interventionist foreign policy. 

His message rings true to all who realize that Americans are living on borrowed time - and borrowed money.  By and large, our representatives in Congress and the White House have blown immense sums of cash - like it's going out of style.  And perhaps it is.

The value of the U.S. dollar has plummeted  90% over the last century... in large part due to trade imbalances, government growth and an out of control Federal Reserve that continues to keep the printing presses smokin'.

Then there's the runaway train of entitlement spending on government pensions, Medicare and the 800 pound gorilla in the budget, Social Security. (The "third rail" most politicians will actively avoid.)

What separates Dr. Paul from the rest of the pack, including Giuliani, McCain, Romney, Clinton and Obama?

He's the sole Presidential aspirant to publicly question the abject failures of his co-workers. 

Let me explain... All candidates attack, blame or smear their rivals.  Paul is no exception - but when he goes on the attack, he has a few references in tow, including a little piece of paper called the U.S. Constitution (a document many a Washingtonian has mistaken for toilet paper).

This expression of truth has been a bitter pill to swallow for direct competitors, especially Rudy Giuliani - and much of the Republican base. 

And it's understandable... as it stands, America is a fabulous country to call home.  In terms of the standard of living we enjoy... all the technology and safety so often taken for granted... we are near the top of the heap. 

But imagine, if you will, an impressive mansion, towering on a hill.  Complete with a fresh coat of paint, carpeting, granite counter tops...the works. 

Pretty nice, eh?  That's the view of most Democrats and Republicans.  What separates Ron Paul from the politi-bots across the stage is this:  he has the intelligence, balls and ability to point out our "house's" termite infestation.  The rotting underbelly of a bloated, far-flung empire.

I truly believe it's not too late to save America.  And there is MUCH worth saving.  But if 2008 rolls around, and it's business as usual in Washington... the clock will be ticking on American prosperity. 

We're a young, powerful nation that's hell-bent on self destruction.

Such destruction is not wished for by U.S. citizens... nor willfuly enabled by their representatives.   But it's happening all the same.

If you agree that we cannot allow our great nation to spiral down the drain of history... If you value personal freedom and the right to pursue happiness free from the shackles of big government... If you want to live in a world where preemptive wars and far-flung, political military operations are a thing of the past...

Then check out Ron Paul.  He just might be the candidate you've been waiting for.  Come 2008, we could finally see American Idol taking a back seat to American politics.  For once, there's a candidate to get passionate about! 

For more information, visit:

http://www.RonPaul2008.com/

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=RonPaul2008dotcom

 

Paid Vacations Among Rich Nations

How does you vacation-time stack up?

-The French receive 30 days/year...by law
-Most other Europeans receive at least 20 days/year

But in the United States, companies are free to dole out...0 days. 

That's right...according to a recent Reuters article, "The United States is the only advanced economy in the world that does not guarantee its workers paid vacation days and paid holidays."

28 million working American's don't catch any vacay time.  A staggering number.  Yet 90% of American employers offer some form of a vacation package to their employees.

Do the math:  That would mean that 28 million people are employed by 10% of American businesses.  That would seem to mean that small businesses are giving their workers the shaft. 

Odds are a law requiring small business owners to pay for vacation days would submarine all but the strongest family franchises. 

So we're between the metaphorical rock and hard place.  Do we, as a nation, continue down a path that exploits our hard-working citizens?  Or do we yank the carpet from out under small business owners?

It just goes to show what a fragile predicament we're in.  And all this, in what's considered a world super-power, the U S of A.  Makes you think, doesn't it?

Meanwhile a country like Finland offers its residents 30 paid vacation days per year and 9 paid holidays!  I've never visited the country, but it's safe to say their small businesses are doing just fine. 

Bank Sells House, Complete with Owner's Corpse

Central air conditioning?  Check.
Granite counter tops?  Check.
Inlaid grandma mummy? Check!

A Madrid bank repossessed a house after its owner fell behind on mortgage payments.  But they never bothered to ask, "why?" 

So when Jorge Giro purchased the home at auction, he got a bit more than he bargained for.

According to El Pais, "the corpse was preserved by salty air in the seaside town of Roses after an apparent death by natural causes..."

Wow... I'm not sure what's worse... the fact that the bank didn't send a rep to scout the property... or that they waited 6 years to foreclose on an owner who hadn't paid a cent since 2001.

Forget those ARM loans... sign me up for a BDY... no payments until death.  Hey, there's a McMansion calling my name!

Freedom, Honorably Discharged

Imagine, for a moment, that you're among the brave young Americans fighting an invisible enemy in the arm pit of the world. 

Regardless of your opinion on US-led progress or lack thereof, it would seem there's little for our troops to be enjoy.  Apart from the occasional movie, which might offer a moment of escape, these kids are removed from the comforts of home.

It gives me no pleasure to point out the irony of today's news:  The Department of Defense is now blocking soldier access to "media-sharing" websites such as YouTube, MySpace and Flickr. 

As America spends billions of dollars and thousands of lives fighting for Arab freedom, a U.S. government agency is stripping freedoms away from its own men and women.

From AP: "The armed services have long barred members of the military from sharing information that could jeopardize their missions or safety, whether electronically or by other means.

The new policy is different because it creates a blanket ban on several sites used by military personnel to exchange messages, pictures, video and audio with family and friends."

I'm disgusted... This particular brand of buffoonery could only spew from a desk-shielded bureaucrat back in Washington D.C.